I am writing this BLOG in response to a recent Facebook post; wherein, the former "friend" made a crass joke about AIDS.
Anyone who knows me is aware that my beloved brother died from AIDS complications in 1997-at the age of 41. I spent five years watching "Brian"-a brilliant musician and best friend- waste away to a shell of himself, while suffering through Karposi Sarcoma, Candida, esophageal "thrush", "wasting syndrome" and dementia. In his final days of life, I tended to his soiled pajamas, bathed him, fed him and sang to him. I cuddled him like he was my infant son-to try to shield him from the fear of the impending "Angel of Death" who called to him day and night.
There are many, in this world-and specifically on the social network of Facebook-who somehow find it humorous to make "jokes" about AIDS. Even 25 years after the onset of the AIDS epidemic worldwide-there appears to be a nefarious approach to this subject: as if those who contract AIDS "brought it on themselves"-through their own actions and consequently, "deserve" it.
When I tell people that my brother died from AIDS, the immediate response is, "Was he gay?"..as if, "being gay" is the only way that one can contract AIDS.
To paraphrase my good friend, writer Barry Crimmins, Brian was "whatever makes YOU feel most uncomfortable."
I find AIDS "jokes" to be bigoted: as the context belies a deeper prejudice, hatred and fear of those who may or may not be homosexual.
This BLOG today, is a direct response to a now DELETED Facebook "friend" who ran the defensive when I told him that his AIDS "joke" was humorless and crass. For some reason-this "friend" believes that since all "ART" is subjective-I have no authority to censor him.
He countered my commentary with this posting:
"Regardless of your personal experience you don't have the authority to deem what is funny and what is not. Art is subjective and affects different people in different ways. The most important thing in life is to remember there is always an "off" switch. "
He is correct in the context that I have no right to censor him-however, I certainly have the right and privilege to simply DELETE him from my "friend" list. It's that simple.
Some may think that I have no sense of humor. On the contrary; I have a great sense of humor-when the remarks do not cut into the heart and soul of another human being's personal experience.
I find political satire riveting. I enjoy jokes about the "human condition"-when it is not overtly mean-spirited...when the humor is universal and meant to help us all reflect on our own individual neurosis.
It is my sincere hope that somehow we can all find it within ourselves to "rethink" our perspective on those who suffer and die from AIDS.
On this Valentine's Day-it will be 14 years since my brother, Brian Douglas Blanchard, left this world. I miss him every single day and I will continue to honor him and his memory by being a "voice" for those who live with and die from AIDS.
Love to All~
Kat Winnn Blanchard
